Want to hook up?

hook upHave you ever wondered why he never called back after the party?  You thought things were clicking…you smiled, you chatted, he laughed…so, what happened?

Actually, the better question to ask yourself is, “what didn’t happen?”  According to the Journal of Personality and Social Psychology,

people who are afraid of rejection tend to overestimate the effectiveness of their flirting.

So, it’s very likely that when you were batting your eyelashes at him, he didn’t even notice.  For all we know, he could’ve just thought you had something in your eye!  He may have gone home thinking you weren’t into him.  So, please don’t start feeling bad about yourself.  And, don’t start calling him a jerk just yet.  Maybe he just didn’t get the message!

So next time, turn it up a notch!  Smile a little bigger, make more eye contact, and pour on the charm…who knows…you may just find some romance!


Invisible overtures: Fears of rejection and the signal amplification bias. Vorauer, Jacquie D.; Cameron, Jessica J.; Holmes, John G.; Pearce, Deanna G. Journal of Personality & Social Psychology. 84(4), April 2003, 793-812

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